Saturday, June 1, 2013

Of Course I Get Homesick... Like Right Now

Sometimes I get incredibly homesick for the home that I don't have.
Sometimes I live not in my own present moment, where I am, but where I wish I was.

Don't get me wrong, I'm happy.... not unhappy... maybe discouraged at times. That doesn't even sound right.

There are so many things I'm longing for, right now. Blues Recesses. Circle 8 Ranch. Canoeing on Lake Washington at midnight to look at the stars. Weekend trips to Olympia and Portland. Bike riding on the Burke Gilman to Fusion. This all refers to my Seattle home.

When it comes to missing Haines, what I miss most are the people and being with them.

I'm not sure which is home, right now....

But I miss it.

Made it's good those Americans are coming. Maybe I'll find someone who I can really connect with, for a while. I need a good, solid connection with another human being. I've had lots of swell ones - but I need one that goes beyond language barriers and three days and two nights.

I have these magical moments and no one to share them with. I do love travelling alone, I do. But, well, after a while, those hours and hours and hours of walking alone give you enough time to think about what it would be like if you had someone else there to walk with you. (Another time, another season, Margaret)

There are so, so many possibilities and sometimes I wonder what I'm doing to myself by tying myself down for three months - three summer months, at that.

I know what I need to do to get over these emotions - go out of my bedroom and be with people. But, well, that's not what's up right now.

It's now two hours later and the funk has pretty much passed (they come in waves faster than rainstorms). Feeling peaceful and ready for bed. I'm done missing things and am excited for tomorrow. We're going to Kamyanitsa village! It's so village-y that it's not on Google Maps - but a search verified it's digital-existence.

1 comment:

  1. Oh I feel you, lady.

    I find a nap usually helps me.

    Thank you, thank you again for sharing your experiences on here.

    Adventures of a Sequin Cat


Your words make me grin.

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